Work... so many things happen at once....

seminggu dua nie ada banyak betul perkara yang nak kena fikir, buat, siapkan... kadang2 rase macam stress tapi still keep smiling...so that I'll keep the positive attitude..the positive aura..so that the environment affected by me still be in positive ones...

Erk...tulun2...xbernafas dah nie..hehe

Bulan nie Form TF and Form BE due...so agak bnyak individual and association aku nak kena attempt tax die...susah jugak bile xde tpt nak tanye and langsung xde guidance untuk buat keje nie...terpaksa lar merangkak mencari information then apply baru leh anta review...but bile bos kate kenapa buat kj lambat..patut seminggu leh siap sume...rase cam..."hello, did you teach me anything on this? No! You're not even give me any template, guidance, notes whatsoever...yang ade cuma bg listing semua client...and expect I know what to do, at what time, what information to gather, who can contact, their contact details and deliver the job without single flaws...haishhhh...sudahla sume clients kamu nie bermasalah...backdated sumenyer..." tp tu dalam ati je la...malas nak membisingkan diri...serabut plak nanti...bile start serabut mula la positive energy aku hilang nanti... (ー_ー)!!

shedishhhnyer.....

I also got 1 company for audit and accounting plus their tax (all at once)...yg nie lagi la...aku dah la xpenah buat audit (and tax too), with no guidelines...tetibe jek dapat tau my Senior yg selalunya akan review keje kitorang (best reviewer and teacher) berhenti...die dpt better offer...well kitorang memang la tau die nak benti...tapi bulan 6 nanti...he shall serve 3mth notice... but so happen when he sent the resign letter...and discuss wif my boss, siap offer kalo ader jobs nanti nak bg this co... my boss bley kata "company nie xlapo job dari awak. you wanna go just go then..today is your last day.." (sort of lah intipati discussion diorang)... well for us... "What???" ..my senior ckp ade bnyk keje kitorang die nak review...so die mintak lagi 3 hari at least untk tolong kitorang... bu my boss replied... no need, today is your last day....hrmmmmmpppp so sad  (>.<)




And bulan nie jugak kena follow up audit yg senior aku tinggalkan...haishhh...kena la liaise ngan clients segala bagai...kalo la boss aku bagi die serve 3mth notice tu kan ok....bukan die ade benda len nak wat pon sementara tunggu bulan 6...at least xde la keje pon not properly transfer...haipp!! rase nak babab je bos aku neyh....sengal la pulak...well aku rase most of thing is ego...ye la partner co die nak benti kan...and maybe die xleh deal ngan loss of people dgn baik...ngeeeee... 
(=^-^=)


Skang executive tpt neyh..sebab tinggal die sorang je laki...emosi die sangat down...coz before nie senior aku tu la tempat kitorang mengadu n mintak tunjuk ajar...skang rase cam anak ayam hilang mak la jugak...semalam die siap cakap kat aku...


"Nurul, kite anta document petang nie la...eso kite dah xde kot..."
"Asal? nak pg mana?...heyyy....jgnnnnnn"


rupenye ari nie..die bagi email ...die bercuti (EL) 2 hari...haishhhh....aku tau die mesti nak ilangkan stress...time senior aku ade, die mang slalu kena ngan bos tp die bertahan coz ada teman utk bg sokongan and nasihat...skang he feeling lost I think...

The saddest kind of sad is the sad that tries not to be sad.. you know, when sad tries to bite its lips, tend not cry and smile and go.  "No, I'm really happy for you" that's when it's really sad
- John Meyer

Mood aku ngan sorang lagi colleague aku pown agak down sebenarnye...ye lar..keje sgtttt banyak...tapi xde sape nak review...bile anta kat bos...die cuma tulis notes sket2...guna tulisan lg hebat dari doktor...tulis le pe die nak...tapi cane nak dapatkan pandai2 la pk sendiri...coz bile tanye...die suh buat je dulu...tp bile buat salah..kena bambu...cane nak buat kalo basic knowledge pon kite xtau kan?


Panjangnyer aku celoteh pasal keje...cukup la sampai cni kot...enjoy photo kat bawah nie....be happy....hepi2 slalu...ahaks

Adehhh...senyummmmm...xperlu kata apa2...ngeee

It's time!!

being imperfect doesnt mean you screw!

dont get too attached then?

not attached cam xfamily la kan rase...feelings stress and left alone plak nanti...

erkkk...ehhhh...huhu

Yeah!

I'm trying to be happy here!

erk...tetibe terselit...tp mood mesti happy kan tgk adorable creation....hehe

banyak2 heppy...

Doa Seorang Isteri

Credit to Tazkirah di FB (Tazkirah Online)

DOA SEORANG ISTERI

Ya Allah Ya Rahman Ya Rahim

Kau ampunilah segala dosa-dosa yang telah aku lakukan

Kau limpahkanlah aku dengan kesabaran yang tiada terbatas

Kau berikanlah aku kekuatan mental dan fizikal

Kau kurniakanlah aku dengan sifat keredhaan

Kau peliharalah lidahku dari kata-kata nista dan keji

Kau kuatkanlah semangatku untuk menempuhi segala cabaranMu

Kau berikanlah aku sifat kasih sesama insan

Sekiranya suamiku ini adalah pilihanmu di Arash

Berikanlah aku kekuatan dan keyakinan untuk terus bersamanya

Sekiranya suamiku ini adalah suami yang akan membimbingku di atas titianMu

Kurniakanlah aku sifat kasih dan redha di atas segala perbuatannya..

Sekiranya suamiku ini adalah bidadara untukku di Al-JannahMu

Limpahkanlah aku dengan sifat tunduk tawaduk akan segala perintahnya..

Sekiranya suamiku ini adalah yang terbaik untukku

Peliharalah tingkah laku serta kata-kata ku dari menyakiti perasaannya..

Sekiranya suamiku ini jodoh yang dirahmatiMu

Berilah aku kesabaran untuk menghadapi segala karenah dan ragamnya..

Tetapi Ya Allah

Sekiranya suamiku ini ditakdirkan bukan hanya untuk diriku seorang

Kau tunjukkanlah aku jalan yang terbaik untuk aku harungi

Sekiranya suamiku tergoda dengan keindahan duniamu

Limpahkanlah aku kekuatanMu untuk memperbetulkan keadaannya..

Sekiranya suamiku mencintai kesesatan

Kau pandulah aku untuk menarik dirinya keluar dari terus terlena..

Ya Allah

Engkau yang Maha Mengetahui akan apa yang terbaik untukku

Engkau juga yang Maha Mengampuni segala kesilapan dan keterlanjuranku..

Sekiranya aku tersilap dalam membuat sebarang keputusan

Bimbinglah aku ke jalan yang engkau redhai

Sekiranya aku lalai dalam menjalankan tanggungjawabku sebagai isteri

Engkau hukumlah aku di dunia tetapi bukan di akhiratMu

Sekiranya aku engkar dan derhaka

Berikanlah aku petunjuk ke arah rahmatMu

Ya Allah Sesungguhnya

Aku lemah tanpa petunjukMu

Aku buta tanpa bimbingan Mu

Aku cacat tanpa hidayahMu

Aku hina tanpa rahmatMu

Kuatkanlah hati dan semangatku

Tabahkan aku menghadapi segala cubaan dari Mu

Jadikanlah aku isteri yang disenangi oleh suamiku

Bukakanlah pintu hatiku untuk menghayati agamaMu

Bimbinglah aku agar menjadi isteri yang solehah

Hanya padaMu Ya Allah ku pohon segala harapan

Kerana aku pasrah dengan dugaanMu

Kerana aku sedar betapa hinanya diriku

Kerana aku seorang insan yang kerap keliru

Kerana aku leka dengan keindahan duniaMu

Kerana kurang kesabaranku menghadapi cabaranMu

Kerana pendek akalku mengharungi ujianMu

Ya Allah Ya Rahman Ya Rahim

Aku hanya ingin menjadi isteri yang dirahmati

Isteri yang dikasihi

Isteri yang solehah

Isteri yang sentiasa di hati suami

Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin

how i wish this cud turn differently~

How strange life is.. I've been fully equipped, my mind is fully aware and prepared for the worst outcome but still when it comes, frustration is there.. I know I'm ready for the result, but deep down inside me still hoping the chances is there.

Early in the morning, I'm going to bathroom...the next cycle has begin..that just mean the IUI had failed. Deep in my heart I already know and aware, I'm not pregnant coz of the high fever but still I'm hoping I was wrong. Every time next cycle begin...I just feel so frustrated.. How I wishes this could turn differently...the result would favor my wishes...

I try not to give up, I try to set my mind as positive as it cud be even though it does hurt every-time the new cycle begin...

IUI... The Journey III

CD 15 - OR 81, pg tadi still ade sket lg choc lepas mandi dah xnampak dah...ari nie pg la clinic...tp sgt x best dpt doc yang tanye je skt ape..xbaca history kite yg lepas2...then x cek ape pon not even tekanan darah or cek pernafasan tuh kan...temp pon xde amek... pastu tros bg ubat...sejentik pon xusik n tengok...perghhh hangin...dr fiza cuti seminggu...patot la aku tgk xpt gile kot org masuk n kuar dr bilik dr tuh...rupenyer x cek pon...aku leh jd doktor gitueh...huh emo dwatnyer bile jumpe dr sengal cmney...aku ingat...doc nie la dulu...time perut aku sakit tetibe sampai aku pengsan2 rase nak guling2 je dari klang sampai KD ari tuh...pg masuk die bg aku ubat thn sakit je...cek lgsg xde...kalo cek mesti dapat detect sakit aku awal2...skali ari nie...aku sakit yg sama cam ari tuh...dr yg sama gak kt klinik tuh aku jumpe balik...perghhhh bengang lar...


CD 16 - CD 19 : OR 95, OR 52, OR 79, OR 88 keje macam biasa...life goes on and on...like usual..

CD 20 - feels waiting is just a boring things to do especially when you feels deep inside, "Did I made it? and the answer just being No"

Kellie Coffey - I Would Die For That 

Jenny was my best friend.

Went away one summer.

Came back with a secret 

She just couldn't keep.

A child inside her,

Was just too much for her

So she cried herself to sleep.

And she made a decision

Some find hard to accept.

To young to know that one day

She might live to regret.

But I would die for that.

Just to have one chance

To hold in my hands

All that she had.

I would die for that.

I've been given so much,

A husband that I love.

So why do I feel incomplete?

With every test and checkup

We're told not to give up.

He wonders if it's him.

And I wonder if it's me.

All I want is a family,

Like everyone else I see.

And I won't understand it

If it's not meant to be.

'Cause I would die for that.

Just to have one chance

To hold in my hands

All that they have.

I would die for that.

And I want to know what it's like

To bring a dream to life.

For that kind of love,

What I'd give up!

I would die for that.

Sometimes it's hard to conceive, 

With all that I've got,

And all I've achieved,

What I want most 

Before my time is gone,

Is to hear the words

"I love you, Mom."

I would die for that. 

Just to have once chance

To hold in my hands

What so many have

I would die for that.

And I want to know what it's like

To bring a dream to life.

How I would love

What some give up.

I would die 

I would die for that.

sharing my fav songs - i would die for that ~

just sharing a few songs by kellie coffey which i found really amazing and inspiring especially this song.. i would die for that.. it made me cry...